Do you remember the last time you had a meaningful conversation with someone? I mean a real conversation that was held in person and  not over Facetime, Facebook, text, through Snapchat, Instagram or any other communication apps that have been created at this point. When did you last genuinely put the time aside in your day to meet up with someone in person and not be staring at a tiny rectangular screen, focusing on the person in front of you instead of what is happening on social media?

It’s a problem that existed before the pandemic, but it is now a problem that has only been made worse over the last two years. 

For the last two years, our phones have connected us. All our apps became our normal in a catastrophically abnormal world. They became our primary way of keeping our relationships strong and healthy when we were unable to physically see friends and family in person. 

But when vaccines were administered and hospitalization rates dropped, we did not go back to normal communication and seem to have forgotten how to carry out face-to-face conversations. Everything has gone virtual. From tutoring sessions to family reunions, everything is from screen to screen.So after months of separation, why are we reuniting with people  only to sit in silence on our phones?

COVID-19 made us too good at connecting online but not as good at meaningfully talking in person. 

This is no blame game. I too am guilty of this.

I wake up and check my phone, and before I sleep I check my phone. 

Recently, I have realized this problem more fully, and I am attempting to make a more concerted effort to  soak up my last memories here in Westport before college in a more meaningful and tangible way. 

I made my friends create a “phone pile” so we could truly focus on each other.  It sounds cliche, but life is too short to spend it staring at a screen of other people’s highlight reel. 

Breaking habits can be extremely hard, but it is not impossible.

Some small things I have done are using the screen-time features on my phone to shut off apps. After a certain amount of time, I am locked out. This has helped me realize the time that has gone by and put me on track. 

I now try to be in the moment with people I hang out with. 

At the end of the day, we will not remember the way some stranger looked with the Cartoon Eyes filter, but more the afternoons we spent at Compo Beach together or the nights at Sherwood diner. 

While the pandemic has made us all a little nervous of the two-straw, one-shake move, the friendship survives nonetheless. And we need to do everything we can to support those relationships. 

We must find an equilibrium and address the growing problem. We, as a society, must put more emphasis on creating and maintaining genuine, in person connections with others through meaningful conversations.