Being a senior in high school is the best and worst of times, especially after the grueling college-application process.

Even with applying out of the way, if you are someone like me who has no clue where they’ll end up going to school next year, the weight has yet to be lifted off of your shoulders.

The congratulatory Facebook posts, logowear, and instagrams adds even more to this anxiety.

They are not only a way of showing support for your peers but also serve as a constant reminder that everyone is getting into college except for those who remain uncommitted … or am I riding solo here?

No matter how many times I hear the phrase, “It will all work out the way it’s supposed to in the end,” there is a huge part of me that really wants to believe it and another part that is flat out fearful of the unknown.

In my situation, I’ve been deferred from, let’s just call it, my “top choice.”

As I read the words that thanked me for my interest in the school but then informed me that  my application would be reviewed at a later date, my heart sank and the tears followed.

I remembered thinking to myself: “Why on earth are you crying? It’s not a ‘no,’ it’s just a not right now!” You prepare yourself for that moment, but no matter the outcome, you automatically react as if your life’s destiny depended solely on that acceptance.

It took a while to realize that a college deferral really isn’t the end of the world.

Sure, maybe I don’t feel the ease of being a second semester senior just yet, and, yeah, just because we’re past the time of hearing back from ED and EA schools, the Facebook posts haven’t come to a halt and probably won’t anytime soon, but I have to take them with a grain of salt.

It wasn’t and partially still isn’t easy to put my future into some stranger’s hands and give them the power to simply say “yes,” “no” or “maybe later.”

But in the long run this process only makes us stronger, and we have to believe that there is a silver lining to all of this chaos; that’s just life.